“Eh… Fourth Wall Repairman…? I mean, what are you, exactly? You kinda look like these guys,” noted Crystal, pointing towards Falcon before pointing over at Bedlam. “Except you look a lot…blobbier.”
“Is he a ghost? Because I ain’t dealing with no spectrals,” said Bedlam, glancing over the table to start munching on food.
“You’re…afraid of ghosts?” asked Falcon, tilting his mask to look towards his friend.
“Me? Pffft, no! No, buddy, please. I ain’t afraid of nothing. I just… don’t want any ghosts stealing my haunting territory, ya know?” Bedlam replied before stuffing his mouth with a ‘monster mouth’ treat.
Crystal rolled her eyes, but otherwise kept her attention on the Repairman.

The Repairman looked down at himself, then looked at the demons. Eh, he sorta looked similar. Though he himself was smaller. And had fewer features. And was “blobbier,” as the woman put it. And was less defined… and looked…blander…

Fine time to get self-conscious.

His attention was thankfully diverted to the beakless demon’s worry about ghosts. The Repairman was tempted to go along with it. The idea of “haunting” the area a bit and then leaving was an appealing one. But then, it seemed that the beakless demon wouldn’t take that too well. Besides, they had actually taken his confession pretty well so far.

“No,” the Repairman said, “I’m not a ghost. I’m a Toon. An inkblot, if you will.”

He looked around.

“…So, who are you?”

Falcon slowly turned from the Repairman to Crystal to watch her eyes widen in surprise. “…told you.”

“Y-yeah… umm…you weren’t kidding,” she spoke softly. She slowly knelt down to get a better look at him. “Yeah, if you’re not hurt too bad…an explanation would be nice,” she replied to the Repairman.

It was just then that Bedlam slowly floated back inside the house, seemingly still a bit startled by the fact that the tombstone had somehow ‘come alive’.

“Well…” the Repairman trailed off. All his excuses were apparently knocked out of him, and it was too late to think of them again. Regrettably, he had to come clean to complete strangers. He hoped for the best, and continued.

“… First off, this is my Halloween costume,” he began, lifting the tombstone shell off and revealing his inky form. “Don’t worry, your lawn isn’t haunted.”

He sighed. He was going to regret this…

“Second,” he continued, “I am the Fourth Wall Repairman, and I thought I’d check this area out.” He motioned towards the spooked demon. “Sorry for scaring your friend there, but I was hoping to do so without anyone noticing.”

He coughed awkwardly. “You can see how that went.”

Apparently, Falcon panicked at the last moment, because the Toon fell right through his sleeves and landed in the grass of the lawn. No one seemed to even question why the Toon had stars circling it, as they were still surprised by the fact that one of their Halloween decorations had seemingly come alive.

“You heard that, right buddy? It screamed! And it was flailing too! What do you think it is?” asked Bedlam, still hiding behind Falcon.

The masked demon slowly knelt down to pick up the Repairman, looking him over with a curious tilt of his head before looking back at Bedlam. “…it’s hurt.” With that, Falcon started to walk back inside with the Toon cradled in his sleeves.

“Eh…umm…” Bedlam seemed to be a bit unsure about following Falcon inside. He decided that he would finish up putting the rest of the tombstones in the front lawn before going into the house.

Meanwhile, Crystal was putting out a bunch of spooky-themed treats, like ‘monster mouths’ made up of apples, peanut butter, and marshmallows, and cupcakes with black and orange icing. Just as she was putting a platter of food down, she glanced up at Falcon. “Oh, hey Falcon! Umm… why are carrying a tombstone? Shouldn’t you be putting that in the yard?” she asked.

Falcon shook his head, heading over towards the couch to gently place it there. “It’s alive.”

Crystal quirked an eyebrow as she followed him to the couch. “…alive? Umm… what makes you say that?” she asked.

“It was screaming and flailing,” the masked demon replied in an as-a-matter-of-fact tone.

“Really…? Cause I was pretty sure that was Bedlam who was screaming like a little girl….” replied Crystal. She looked down over at the tombstone on the couch, wondering if it truly was alive.

The stars were surprisingly good entertainers. They danced, they were attention-grabbing, and they even sang bird-like songs.

Yet, each time they circled, their beauty began to fade. They began to shrink, their songs became quitter, their dances slower. The Repairman soon tired of this and began to drift back to reality.

His vision was still a bit blurry and star-struck, but that did not look like a night sky. Not a good sign. Especially since he started to remember exactly what caused him to see stars in the first place. The voice saying “…screaming like a little girl…” certainly helped him recall that.

Wait, voice? This didn’t sound like either of the creatures that had tormented him earlier. He had to know who this was and where they were; he figured the jig was already up.

He slowly sat up, shaking any remaining stars away. He turned towards this new person and was surprised to find, not a third demon, but a (presumably) human woman looking at him. Was she major too, or just a party guest?

“Who…” the Repairman began, still a little dazed. “Where…”

He paused, realizing the trouble he could be in. “I can explain…”

“Eh-” Bedlam’s eyes widened as the Toon twitched in his grasp. It was only a few seconds before he yelped and threw it up in the air to fly behind Falcon to hide.

Just as the Toon was thrown up in the air, Falcon stretched out his sleeves to try and catch it.

“That thing! It moved! I swear it moved!” Bedlam cried out from behind Falcon, grasping at his friend’s shoulder for protection.

Sweet relief. The Repairman finally began breathing normally. He no longer had to worry about being tickled into being revealed.

Now his only concern was where he’d land (and how).

He could see the two looking up at him, and quickly realized that this was the “worse” part of it.

Okay, light as a feather, stiff as a board, light as a feather, stiff as a board…

The Repairman began to descend, trying to keep as rigid as possible.

His eyes widened as he fell. Gosh, was this high up. He hoped he could land safely.

lightasafeatherstiffasaboardlightasafeatherstiffasaboard– Oh, for the love of-

“AIEEE!”

He began flailing, no longer caring who saw him. He just needed to find a way to get out of this predicament, to figure out how to have a soft landing, to —

WHAP!

The Repairman began seeing stars. Before he fainted, he briefly wondered if others could see these brilliant, colorful, wonderful stars.

@falconcrystal

“What? Lemme see that,” replied Bedlam. Falcon had barely looked back down at the Toon before Bedlam took it from Falcon’s grasp, squeezing their sides a bit. “Huh. You’re right. It is squishy. That’s weird. What kind of man-made phlebotinum you think they made this with?”

Falcon decided to stay silent, watching as his friend took it out of his grasp. He thought he had barely heard a snicker, but he didn’t comment on it. After all, it couldn’t have been the decoration laughing…right?

Okay, he was being handed off, maybe this one would–

WHY?

This creature was almost as ticklish as the other. The Repairman had no idea how long he would last. Experience told him he would only crack at the worst time. Clearly, the worst has yet to come. He hoped he could leave before then.

C’mon, the Repairman thought, desperately trying to will his way out of this, I’m just a different prop, nothing to see here put me down put me down put me…

“…phlebotinium…”

Twitch.

@falconcrystal

askthefwrp reblogged your post “The Repairman liked taking detours around October. He’d been meaning to scope this universe out anyway, so he decided…”

Just as the two finished decorating the front of the house, Bedlam glanced over at the lawn decorations. It was basically littered with fake tombstones that were generally made out of styrofoam or plastic.

“Alright, I guess the only thing left to do is to place those tombstone all about the yard,” Bedlam replied, floating over to the pile of tombstones.

“…how so?” asked Falcon, tilting his head a bit so that his white mask followed suit.

“Really? Man, you never really been around these human neighborhoods during Halloween? Here, I’ll show you…” Bedlam sighed as he flew over to one of the styrofoam tombstones to pick them up before quickly placing it at some far end of the lawn. “Like this, okay? Face up and straight and stuff. It’s easy,” the skull-headed demon promised.

As Bedlam quickly began to take out each tombstone one by one, Falcon slowly walked over to the other side of the pile so as not to get in his friend’s way. However, it was also the side that the Fourth Wall Repairman was on.

As Falcon unknowingly picked up the Toon with his flimsy red sleeves, he couldn’t help but notice something. He tilted his head again as he looked down at the ‘decoration’ in his grasp, gently squeezing it.

Just as Bedlam was putting down a fourth tombstone, he looked back to see what Falcon was doing. “Hey, buddy, I’m halfway done with the lawn! What are you doing over there?” he asked.

Falcon was still staring at the tombstone and gently squeezing it when he looked up at his friend. “…it’s squishy.”

The Repairman stiffened as the plague mask came closer. He realized he should have come later. No problem, though. He’d just be set with the other gravestones and he’d soon be free to explore a bit. Not an issue.

…Wait, why wasn’t he being put down? Why was the clothed one staring at him so oddly? Why was he squeezing him?

And why did he only become ticklish at the worst possible times?

All these whys faded as the Repairman quickly realized the predicament he was in. It took every droplet in his body not to squirm as he was squished by this character. He had to hold his breath; everything was telling him to burst out laughing, to swat the hands away, to recoil, just to do something. But no. He could handle it, albeit barely.

And then the creature said “it’s squishy.”

He didn’t know what made that so funny, but the snicker came out.

Okay, okay. don’t panic. His unwitting captor was looking away. Maybe if he held his breath again, he’d be fine.

…What were the excuses he thought up, again?

The Repairman liked taking detours around October. He’d been meaning to scope this universe out anyway, so he decided this was probably a good time to wander around. This, however, was tricky with his rigid tombstone costume. However, his ambling wasn’t halted until he tripped over a sign. Looking back, he saw that it gave directions to an “open party.” Perhaps THIS would be where the major characters would be. He could pretend to be a decoration, check out the area, and swipe a few candies.

falconcrystalarchivedblog:

Crystal had been busy cooking up some Halloween-themed party snacks. She wasn’t too worried about anyone coming over. If anything, she was sure that Bedlam and Falcon would help her eat it. Falcon peered over at the table where she had laid out pretzel spiders and monster-like sandwiches before looking back up at her.

“…this is what you do every Halloween?” he asked her.

“Not really. Usually I just have a bowl of candy and wait for kids to come by. It’s fun to dress up though. And hey, I guess this would be the one time of the year you could be yourself and no one would blink an eye,” Crystal replied with a smile.

“Hmm…I suppose so,” Falcon agreed with a small nod.

“Yeah…hey, can you check on Bedlam? I thought he promised to finish decorating the front of the house. It’s not really gonna look like a party if lawn and such looks all barren,” she told him.

With a silent nod, Falcon walked out the front of the house. There, he could see that Bedlam was floating around, stretching cobwebs to decorate the corners and the ends of the roof.

“Woo, man…. This is starting to look good. Maybe I should become an exterior decorator. Oh, hey, buddy! You come to help me put up the plastic spiders?” asked Bedlam as he strung out the last bit of fake cobwebs.

Falcon shook his head. “Crystal asked that I check up on you.”

“Tch! Slave-driver. I haven’t gotten the lawn decorated yet, but I’m getting there! I’m only one demon, ya know,” Bedlam replied, rolling his blank white eyes.

Falcon glanced to see at how barren the lawn was before looking back towards Bedlam. “I could help.”

“Heh…thanks, pal. You’re the best. Hand me some of those plastic spiders, would ya?” asked Bedlam as Falcon used his sleeve to scoop up some of the fake arachnids and hand them to his friend.

The Repairman studied the creatures from a nearby hedge. It seemed he was right; he didn’t see these kinds of characters anywhere else around here. These must be major. No mere extra draws attention to themselves like these two did. The Repairman itched to get closer. He needed to know more about these guys.

Besides, he could smell the party preparations, and this was one of his longer detours…

Still, no need to make himself known. He still didn’t know how kindly this place takes to strangers, and he didn’t like answering nosy questions anyhow. He looked about for a way to avoid contact.

The good news was the creatures seemed to be preoccupied. The bad news was he didn’t know how long they’d look away, and there weren’t many places to hide. The only place that seemed safe enough was with the unused décor, and that was awfully close to the stars of the picture.

Then again, those pretzels were awfully nice-smelling, and he had an awfully big (and sometimes just plain awful) job to do.

The Repairman took a deep breath, and quietly moved across the grass towards the yet-to-be-placed decorations, all the while trying to rehearse different excuses in his mind.

Trick or – HI! – I’m the TALKING TOMB – no, that won’t do – I heard there was a… – Did you know — General maintenan —

He shook his head. He wouldn’t be caught; there was no need to think up anything.

▼[[also, hi!]]

labratextraordinaire:

▼- Our muses in a broken elevator.

The rat stayed relatively quiet as she entered the elevator, keeping her hands together and trying to avoid eye contact with the other person inside. She tapped a button and stood at the other end of the space as the door closed, wringing her hands together as the elevator started going up. All seemed to be going well until suddenly, the elevator came to a halt. Lab Rat froze, eyes wide with panic.

“… O-oh gosh,” she said in a small voice, looking around for something that might have been causing the problem. “Wh… what happened?! I-It isn’t supposed to stop!!” Looking around frantically, she turned to the other person in the elevator. “D-Do you know how to f-f-fix this?” she asked, her voice shaky with panic.

The Repairman didn’t even care if he was seen as he went up the elevator. He’d been checking on the Wall in this particular universe for a while, and he just wanted to finish up and go somewhere else. He didn’t even bother to look and see what kind of place the building is. Luckily, there were stranger things in this world than a sentient inkblot, so he managed to get to the elevator in this building uninterrupted. Not even the rat who walked in seemed to notice anything unusual.

And then the lights flickered, and the elevator lurched to a halt.

The Repairman sighed. Of course there was going to be another delay, right as he was almost done.

He was shocked when the rat asked him if he could fix the lift. How did she know he was a repairman? No matter. He had had no experience with elevators. Although… he had been a repairman for a long time. It’s what he was drawn to do.

“I’ve been repairing…” The Repairman hesitated. This was probably the worst world to bring up the Fourth Wall in.

“I’ve been repairing for decades,” the Repairman said with questionable confidence. “I think I could do this.”

He pulled an enormous red toolbox out from behind his back and dropped it on the floor. The elevator rattled, forcing the Repairman to try and keep his balance. Thankfully, it soon stopped.

If the Repairman had feet, he would be sheepishly looking at them. As it were, the floor would do.

“Heh,” he chuckled humorlessly, “Sorry ‘bout that. There’s a lot in there.”

doctor-whooves-ask:

askthefwrp:

doctor-whooves-ask:

askthefwrp:

doctor-whooves-ask:

askthefwrp:

doctor-whooves-ask:

askthefwrp:

That’s good to know, doctor-whooves-ask.

What’s the measurer for?

And I would like to keep it short, thank you very much.

Well, the first thing your doing wrong if you want to keep it short is your measuring the wall at an angle! If you want a short inspection, measure it vertically!

The Repairman paused at the remark. He turned his eyes back to his measuring tape.

Indeed, it was crooked. The inkblot would even go so far as to think it was sagging. It certainly wasn’t touching the Wall he was inspecting.

The Repairman’s eyes lowered in embarrassment as he adjusted the tape.

“I… I knew that…”

Oh, and also, I’d put that fire out. On your left.

“Oh?”
The Repairman turned. A small blaze met his shocked gaze. He quickly hopped off his ladder and produced a ragged, scorched, and overall poorly-aged fire blanket from his toolbox. Throwing it carelessly over the flame, he turned back to Whooves.
“I have no idea how that happened. Do you?”

Actually, no. *A figure knocks him over* Ow! For once I don’t do something and this is how the universe repays me! If I had to guess, I’d say they did it!

The Repairman was looking back at the smoldering blanket while Whooves was talking. He jumped at the outcry and turned to the scene. He was about to ask what happened when Whooves complained about his fate.
The Repairman rolled his eyes. He didn’t believe in karma, but he thought one had to do more than “nothing” (which was doubtful, knowing the equine) to have favorable things happen.
Besides, the time lord looked fine. He must just tripped. The blob thought about this when Whooves said something that snapped him out of it.
“They?”

Askthefwrp liked for a starter.

hxlfgeniehero:

askthefwrp:

hxlfgeniehero:

askthefwrp:

hxlfgeniehero:

“ Fourth wall…. Oh! That screen where people watch me? Like how that girl’s writing what I’m saying right now?” Annndddd this is why we called you.

He was used to this sort of reaction by now. Most characters, upon learning of the Wall, naturally tested its limits. He reminded himself to be patient (anger could wait for repeat offenders) and looked up at the half-genie.
“Please,” he said, as calmly as one can with a literal siren blaring on their head, “This job is very taxing as is, so I would appreciate you not making it worse.“
And with that, he pulled supplies from his toolbox and got to work, all the while trying very hard to ignore the writer.

“ Oh, sorry!” She apologized quickly, standing off to the side. Yeah, she better be.

The inkblot paused for a moment. Not many folks he met stopped the havoc so quickly. Okay, MAYBE he was less tactful and calm with a few, but still.
“It’s… no problem. I’m just not used to doing much work here, really. Speaking of here, where am I?”

“ You’re in Scuttle Town! I’m the guardian half-genie around here!”

“Well, hello there,” the Repairman said, finally stopping to look at his surroundings. “It’s a nice-looking town. You must be good at your job, because I can’t see anything that needs guarding from!”