Penny had been working late. 18-Volt’s
work computer had broken and he needed to finish his games, so she had
agreed to fix it. But this was hard work. How the heck does someone
manage to get bubblegum inside a computer?!
She noticed how late it was, so she decided to finish for the day and get some sleep.
Then she heard some music playing.
Someone was here. She immediately ran towards the testing room and noticed the strange ink-looking guy at the end of the room.
“Hey! Who are you and what are you doing here?” she asked.
The Repairman jumped about three feet off the ground as someone called out to him. He nearly dropped the controller as he did so.
He turned around to find a girl looking at him in alarm. He started to sweat, unable to think of a lie that could get him out of this without making his job harder. Finally, he cleared his throat.
“I’m the Fourth Wall Repairman,” he explained. “I…wasn’t sure if I should count your games here, and was trying to figure it out…”
He glanced back to see the GAME OVER.
“…Keyword being try. And, uh, who are you?”
Penny examined the room. It didn’t look like he was doing anything too bad, so she decided to let it slide, but remained slightly suspicious.
“I’m Penny. Penny Crygor.” she introduced herself. “In case it wasn’t obvious, I work here.”
She looked around, checking to see if there was anything missing. It looked perfectly fine.
“You’re lucky my boss isn’t here or he’d be pretty mad at you.”
“Oh, yeah,” the Repairman nodded, embarrassed. “Pretty lucky that you didn’t kick me out right away, aren’t I?”
Was he really becoming so careless that any middle-schooler could catch him?
“…Yeah, sorry ‘bout all this,” he said, “but I gotta figure out if any of these games break the Fourth Wall.”
…And then decide whether a Fourth Wall break in a piece of fiction within the fictional world actually counted. Gah. He got a headache just THINKING about thinking about that.
Penny wanted desperately to say ‘Literally or figuratively’ considering what some of their games were like, but she saw how confused the Fourth Wall Repairman looked so she decided not to.
“Wow, that sounds… uh… complicated.” she said. “Well, you don’t seem to be doing anything bad, so let’s keep this between us, okay?”
“Yeah, it is,” he admitted. It was especially hard when you were kinda bad at the games you’re supposed to be inspecting.
“Well, thanks. And sorry for all this.”
He turned back to the game, knowing that there were probably more than the four microgames he blundered through. Maybe he’d be able to get to more.
Well, this time he managed to retain two lives before…
“SPEED UP?! What? No! Augh!”
…and Game Over.
Well, at least he saw a FEW more microgames that time…
For
some reason, he had trouble escaping the shadow’s grip, despite a fluid
body. He struggled and grunted, but it was clear it wasn’t happening.
“Magical glow orb….?”
Good thing a Wall break appeared elsewhere. This was one of the few times he found the stupid light helpful.
He
pulled a rather large vice from behind his back and put it over his
head with surprising ease. Carefully, he put it over the bulb, and made
it just tight enough to hold on to it.
“HEY, MONSTER!” he called out. “PUT US DOWN GENTLY OR THE MAGIC ORB GETS IT!”
It wouldn’t hurt. Besides, he had spare bulbs. He just hoped Bowyetta could guess that.
“W-what?! No! You WOULDN’T!“
Even Bowyetta was shocked by this. She tried to get free of the Shadow’s grasp, but it was surprisingly hard to move through the liquid metal. “M-Mr. Sir! You must not be doing that! You will being quite injured!”
The shadow seemed very unsure about what to do. She wanted them BOTH. That light would look awfully pretty on her head… But, she was in need of a new pair of legs… Maybe she could wash them off?
“ENOUGH!!” Eventually the shadow just… Sort of let go. “If I can’t have your bodies, then… Neither can YOU! I’ll crush you here and now!”
Bowyetta clunked to the ground, and rushed to help Mr. Sir. “M-Mr. Sir! What we are to be doing?!”
“Try me,” the Repairman said, smugly. Finally, some decent results. Though he’d have to explain to Bowyetta that he’d be fine either way later.
Of course, when the shadow let go, THAT’S when the vice decided to be as heavy as it looked. He flipped over, falling head-first to the ground with a CLANG!
After (for want of a better phrase) his ears stopped ringing, he found the lever for the vice to be just out of reach. He was as helpless as a turtle on its back.
Bowyetta still came to him for advice, and he was running dry. This was fairly new to him, and nothing seemed to work for long. He needed someone who has seen it all, and survived it…
“…I…don’t know,” he grunted, trying to push himself out. “Maybe we should call Bonkakira…”
At least, that’s what he caught himself thinking as he moved the new shipment of flour to rest on the nearby wall. The poor thing had definitely seen better days, hardly able to support the large sacks of raw sugar and ceramic cookie jar resting atop it. It wasn’t in the best of shape when he bought the place a few years back either but he’d be procrastinating on it for as long as he could remember.
However, the bakery wasn’t busy today. Perhaps it was time to give the shelf the care it deserved. He grabbed the nearest step stool and climbed up to figure out the problem.
It was at that moment that the bell signaling of an entering customer rang.
“Oh! Sorry!” He turned around from what he was doing. “Welcome! I’ll be with you in just a minute!”
The Fourth Wall Repairman knew his next job was a small one (comparatively, at least), so as he was passing through Hyrule, he didn’t see the harm in looking around a bit first. Maybe he’d actually learn to read some Hylian.
…so that means “Bakery…” he thought as he smelled the goods from just outside. It actually smelled pretty good. Maybe he’d step in, now that he’d learned his lesson from that bunny guy and carried some Rupees…
He carefully maneuvered his tool cart into the bakery. Wow, all this stuff looked good! He’d have to remember to get his pet Cat Slime something, too. He just hoped there was no “three hundered Rupees for a single cupcake” nonsense.
“Oh, take your time!” he called back cheerfully. “Need a bit to look anyway!”
Wait, that voice sounded oddly familiar…
“Oh wonderful! Take all the time you need!” He cheered back over his shoulder.
They sounded like a new customer for sure, rather than a regular. That was always a nice change of pace. One of the most rewarding parts of his job was turning a fresh face into a regular. It meant he was doing something right.
The shelf was flimsy, supports splitting from their place in the wall. It wouldn’t be long before they gave out if he wasn’t careful. Even the board of it had warped and distorted just slightly with weight. Part of him wanted to take everything down diligently, much like Blue might. However, he had a customer behind him. Perhaps in need of guidence? It was horribly rude to keep them waiting. Distasteful manners.
‘Oh, well…I’m sure it can wait a few minutes. It’s been supporting this stuff for years now.’ He thought to himself as he gingerly stepped down from the stool in the hopes of meeting the new face in town.
“Hello! Sorry about that. How can I help you?” He beamed.
The Repairman thought he heard creaking and snapping from somewhere behind the counter.
Hey, he knew that face! It was one of those Links! Wait, wasn’t he a ghost the last time they met? Boy, these timelines…
He shook himself out of that. Wouldn’t want to keep HIM waiting. Besides, he still had a Wall to fix a few worlds over.
“Um, hi,” the inkblot said, looking at Link with slight concern. “Am I interrupting anything…?”
He hadn’t really thought of Shinko to be the type to need guardians. Well, she was a kid again, but still...
As he kept digging for some kind of glue (where was it?), he shook himself out of that thought and smiled.
“Aw, that sounds pretty nice!”
Finally, he pulled out a large bottle of mucilage and turned back to the group.
“Here it i…oh,” he said, before shifting gears. “Heh, sorry.”
The Repairman gestured vaguely around where Crystal had been.
“Yeah, they’re over around there,” he said. Realizing what he just heard, he looked at Crystal quizzically.
“…Wait, you don’t see it?” he asked. “…Maybe give it a second…?”
“They’re not Toons,” Shinko explained with a sheepish grin and a shrug. “But, uh, Mr. Repairman…. do you need us to get out of your way while you work? I’ve never actually watched you patch up the Fourth Wall before, I don’t think.”
Crystal looked slightly confused as she glanced back at Belial.
“Do you have any idea what he’s talking about, Belial?” Crystal asked the demon woman.
“I don’t really care. So long as he doesn’t make a mess of my cafe, he can do what he wants,” the masked demon replied irritably as she turned her backs to them, her wings more or less obscuring herself as she continued to work.
“Hmm?”
The Repairman pretty much thought of EVERYONE he met as a Toon of some kind, even if they weren’t very…well, traditionally TOONY at times. Maybe that’s all Shinko meant. It would make sense that some more down-to-earth Toons would have a harder time seeing the Wall.
“Ah, okay,” he said, nodding knowingly at Shinko. “Anyway, uh, I shouldn’t need THAT much space, thanks. I think I can just glue this one shut….I mean, if you want to see me work, sure…”
He shrugged and headed over to the spot next to where Crystal was. Realizing the glue could probably make a mess of the cafe, he pulled out a rolled-up newspaper and unfurled it under the crack.
Siblings-a-Fixin' 